Lessee, me and… Diamond Tiara.  
Right, excuse me one moment.  
|| ||

@Opal Heart  
Passes a 10 bit note to Sombra  
Me: Ta mate.  
Sombra: CRYSTALSSSS.

[Me]“So… seeing as you’re not busy today Pinkie… what should we do?”
 
[Pinkie]“I have a few ideas… wanna go to the Gazebo?”
 
[Me]“Sure!”
 
[Sombra]“Taxes are what’s wrong with this country!”
 
[Pinkie]“Silly Sombra!”
 
[Me]“Sombra… why such a dickish move?”

Me and Pinkie share a romantic at the Gazebo, when Sombra ruins it by shouting, “Taxes are what’s wrong with this country!”

“Cut Coupons, Save Money!” shouted King Sombra, ruining the moment between Anon and Maud Pie.
 
The reanimated king soon found himself buried under MANY tonnes of masonry.
 
Maud Pie did not react well to clit-blocking interruptions.
 
Anon wondered why the fuck King Sombra would comeback from the dead AGAIN simply to do such a dick move.

[Me]“Well, Twilight Sparkle, got any plans for this week?”
 
[Twilight]“Well…I’ve got a few…“ideas”…”
 
[Me]“Ooh la la-”
 
[Snips]“Before you can help a friend on drugs, you must understand that drugs alter the way the brain functions!”
 
[Twilight]“Well, THAT ruined the mood.”
 
[Me]“Indeed.”

[Me]“Well, Twilight Sparkle, got any plans for this week?”
 
[Twilight]“Well…I’ve got a few…“ideas”…”
 
[Me]“Ooh la la-”
 
[Snips]“Before you can help a friend on drugs, you must understand that drugs alter the way the brain functions!”
 
[Twilight]“Well, THAT ruined the mood.”
 
[Me]“Indeed.

@Scrounge  
Not surprised, just annoyed.

Chrysalis and I are having a romantic moment when Tirek shouts “Cut coupons, save money!”

@lazertomato  
Think about who his sister is for a second and you’ll be less surprised.

“Well, Chrysalis, seeing as how you’re gonna be here in Ponyville for a while, do you have any ideas of how we could… entertain ourselves?”
 
“I think I have a few ideas…”
 
“READING IS A FORM OF ENTERTAINMENT THAT’S OFTEN OVERLOOKED THESE DAYS!”
 
“God DAMN IT, Shining Armor!”

Chrysii and I are having a relaxing time when Mr. Cake says stay away from tight crotch-area pants.

@Scrounge
 
Date with Mulia, and Mac comes in and gives me advice about my career and where I’m going.
 
I swear that has to be the best escape route yet.

@QuasarNova  
What’d you get?

Considering what I got, yeah, I would use it as a escape route

Romantic moment with Zecora ruined by Discord shouting “Aboyt 10% of horses die from colic!”
 
Seems pretty legit actually.

Me and Babs Seed have a nice time when king Sombra ruins it by shouting: “Cut coupons, save money!”  
Then i shout back: “Give this pony a cider!” because i use coupons every day. Then i get back to being a pedo

I’m with Little Strongheart and I get career advice from Tirek

@Rockosocko  
Well, there’s a pot/kettle thing for you, I’d be surprised if Snails even knew how to read!

I share a romantic moment with Cloudkicker, only to have it ruined by Snails shouting, “Reading is a form of entertainment that is usually overlooked these days!”

Me and Sweetie are dating then Blueblood ruins it by saying that you should avoid tight pants.  
wat

@Kerion  
I’m wondering why he didn’t try to bail sooner, actually.

@Scrounge  
Can you blame him?

@Cypresswolf  
You just wanted an excuse to not be on a date with Diamond Tiara any more. :P

Diamond Tiara and I share a romantic moment (leaning in for a kiss) when Discord ruins by shouting “Reading is a form of entertainment that is usually overlooked these days!”
 
…My goodness, he’s right! Diamond, don’t you see? We should be expanding our minds instead of flexing our lip muscles….To the Library! (runs off to Twilight’s tree)