TWILIGHT:
May I have your attention please!
May I have your attention please!
Will the real Pinkie Pie please sit down!
I said: will the REAL Pinkie Pie please sit down!

APPLEJACK:
Uh, We’re gonna have a problem here…

PINKIE:
Y’all act like you’ve never seen a pink pony before
Eyes all on the floor, like Mrs. Cake is being a whore
with me babysitting worse than before
Apples to the core? That apple core is rotten now (Ew!)
And now Twilight’s like:

TWILIGHT:
Oh no, what a catastrophe! She didn’t use the legend of the mirror pool, did she?

PINKIE:
And then Spike said.. nothing you bronies!
Spike’s a bone-head, he’s hiding under his bed!
Brony guys love Pinkie Pie (chugga chugga choooo–)

APPLEJACK:
Pinkie Pie, I’m sick of her, look at her
Hopping around shaking her you-know-what
in front of you-know-who

RAINBOW DASH:
Yeah but she’s so fun though

PINKIE:
Yeah I probably consumed too much sugar and sodium
But no worse, than what’s going on at Nickelodeon
Sometimes I wanna get on TV and just cut cheese
but I can’t! Nor can Cheese cut Pinkie

My plot is in your face! My plot is in your face!
Clap your hooves and do a little shake!
And that’s the dance move we teach to little kids
And we expect them to not know what twerking is

Of course they’re gonna know Friendship is Magic
and everything that’s tragic in the world is not run by little girls
We ain’t nothin’ but horses!
Well some of us donkeys that can’t be bothered to sing on key

But if we can show a male and a female pony’s marriage
Then why can’t two female ponies just kiss?
All I know is Eminem will be pissed if he hears this
Sorry, those bronies can’t resist!

‘Cause I’m a pink pony, yes, I’m the pink pony!
all you other pink ponies are just being phonies
So won’t the real pink pony please sit down! Please sit down! Please sit down!
‘Cause I’m a pink pony, yes, I’m the pink pony!
all you other pink ponies are just being phonies
So won’t the real pink pony please sit down! Please sit down! Please sit down!

PINKIE:
Fluttershy doesn’t have to be loud or annoying
But I do, mainly because I get paid to
You think I wanna be best pony?
Half of you bronies don’t even follow me, let alone know me

RARITY:
But Pinkie Pie darling, you’re just so weird!

PINKIE:
So? Don’t you know that’s why I’m feared?
My jokes go on longer than Star Swirl’s beard?
Damn Dashie! 10 seconds and the sky is cleared?

Now I can properly flip off Gilda
I wanna control her with my mind like Matilda
Griffon bitch, yelling at Fluttershy
Making Andrea cry, that’s why we all want you to die

Put me on blast on Discovery Kids!
And show the world how The Hub wanted to get rid of us
I’m sick of you DeviantArt groups, who the hell even starts groups?
All you losers ever do is fart poop

There’s hundreds of us who talk like me,
Trot like me, break the fourth wall like me
Who hop like me, stop drop and clop like me
I’d rather be me than be Trixie or Flash Sentry!

‘Cause I’m a pink pony, yes, I’m the pink pony!
all you other pink ponies are just being phonies
So won’t the real pink pony please sit down! Please sit down! Please sit down!
‘Cause I’m a pink pony, yes, I’m the pink pony!
all you other pink ponies are just being phonies
So won’t the real pink pony please sit down! Please sit down! Please sit down!

I’m like a head trip to watch!
Weather you watch me for my personality or for my crotch
Look I’m just glad Hasbro didn’t draw balls on ponies
But now all you bronies answered the call and hung it up on your wall

I just go around being all random
Cupcakes I hand ’em out to this fandom
Oops, did I say “hand”, I meant hoof
Keeping in with the whole anybody/anypony spoof

It’s funny, ‘cause at this rate when we’re canceled
Us ponies will live on through brony artist’s pencils
Twilight will still be crazy, Dashie will still be lazy,
Flutter will still sniff daisies, Applejack’s dog will still have rabies,
And Rarity will never say “maybe” to a date with Spike
Man, take a hike to Haiti, find a new lady
Maybe that dragon that fluttershy was raggin’ on will be at BronyCon

So will the real Pinkie please sit down
and if you wouldn’t mind please make a frown
‘Cuz only one of us can smile so bright, you lose your sight
I don’t bite but if you’re a cake I might!

‘Cause I’m a pink pony, yes, I’m the pink pony!
all you other pink ponies are just being phonies
So won’t the real pink pony please sit down! Please sit down! Please sit down!
‘Cause I’m a pink pony, yes, I’m the pink pony!
all you other pink ponies are just being phonies
So won’t the real pink pony please sit down! Please sit down! Please sit down!

‘Cause I’m a pink pony, yes, I’m the pink pony!
all you other pink ponies are just being phonies
So won’t the real pink pony please sit down! Please sit down! Please sit down!
‘Cause I’m a pink pony, yes, I’m the pink pony!
all you other pink ponies are just being phonies
So won’t the real pink pony please sit down! Please sit down! Please sit down!

Hee hee! Guess there’s a pink pony in all of us..
Buck it. Let’s all sit down.