Corrupt A Wish (Forum Game)

So, I’m taking this straight from the Payday 2 safe house lounge forum from Steam. And I think the original poster of that thread explains it best.
 
“Welcome to corrupt a wish (I may have spelled it wrong) But in this discussion someone makes a wish and you try to corrupt it! after you corrupted a wish you must wish for a wish (lol). for example
 
XxnoscoperoffazexX:I wish for money
 
Darude dankstorm: Granted, You get money but its yellow”
 
I’ll start.
 
I wish Sunset Shimmer would appear in the main series.

Hmm… I’ll try it…
 
Sunset has appeared, but everyone ignores her…
 
I wish starlight was in EG…

@Toyminator900  
She’s put in, but they completely mangle her character.
 
I wish Twidash to be canon.

@Nattes Novgrel  
Lesbians were kicked out…
 
I wish I existed…

@Toyminator900  
“Lesbians were kicked”?
 
You exist, and you are born in Zimbabwe.
 
I wish Ralph Bakshi would write for an episode.

Not bad, you two.
 
“I wish Ralph Bakshi would write for an episode.”  
Granted, but the episode was considered his worst writing in his entire career.
 
I wish there was a portal to Equestria somewhere on earth.

@Briianz  
Wish granted. The portal is in Somalia.
 
I wish Black Sabbath did music for the show.

Black Sabbath played, but it had to be removed because of rights…
 
I wish I was a pony…

You now are, but you are the worst pony.
 
I wish I had friends.

You have friends, but they never speak to you…
 
I wish I could drive

@toxicrystal  
Your three best friends are Ed Gein, Pol Pot and Trigglypuff.
 
I wish for a Filthy Rich episode.

Your episode turned into worst episode…
 
I wish I could write this…

You can.  
It is the only thing you know how to write.
 
I wish I had some delicious food in front of me.

@toxicrystal  
Tonight’s serving will be fried ants.
 
I wish for Lauren Faust to come back.

She came back, but was paid minimum wage and she’s gone again…
 
I wish I could bake…

You can.  
Just not well. So bad, in fact, that the very smell is toxic.
 
I wish I had superpowers.

You’re superpowers unfortunately melted your brain cells…
 
I wish I ruled them all!

You now rule the world.  
Unfortunately, the people hate you. They stage a massive coup and brutally murder you.
 
I wish I knew what to wish for.

You now know… For 5 secs…
 
I wish everyone would love starlight…

They now do.  
They all love her so much, they attempt to create the Moon in her image.  
There are no survivors.
 
 
I wish diamond was the hardest metal known to man.

Diamonds are now hard, so hard, they now cut through everything…
 
I wish for piZAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!

Granted, but there are no toppings on it…it’s just the crust, bread, and pizza sauce. Enjoy.
 
I wish I knew how to draw ponies perfectly.

You now can.  
Unfortunately, you can only draw them in one specific pose, and whatever else you draw looks like complete and utter shit.
 
I wish I could actually last a turn in the Hunger Games Simulator.

You now can… But you lose on the next one…
 
I wish I was heard

You are.  
By deaf people only.
 
I wish I could become the ruler of Hell.